Introduction
This guide has been created to help organisations and initiatives become more inclusive and welcoming towards the asexual community. It brings together key concepts, explains why asexual people are an integral part of the LGBTQ+ family, and offers practical advice on overcoming barriers.
Many of the recommendations provided are universal: they will help make services more welcoming not only for asexual people, but for the entire queer community. These are basic steps towards creating a space where people feel safe and have the opportunity to participate fully in community life.
What you need to know about asexuality
Asexuality (ace) is an umbrella term for those who experience little or no sexual attraction to others. It is just as natural a facet of human sexuality as any other orientation.
Important to remember:
- It is not an illness. Asexual people are perfectly fine — there is nothing ‘wrong’ with them. Asexuality is not linked to health conditions or hormone levels.
- It is not a choice. Unlike celibacy (voluntary abstinence), asexuality is an innate predisposition. That said, some asexual people may engage in sexual relationships for various reasons (for example, for emotional closeness with partners or to have children), and this does not make their identity ‘less asexual’.
- Attraction comes in many forms. Sexual desire and romantic attachment are not always the same thing. One may seek deep romantic relationships (homo-, hetero- or biromanticism) or feel no need for romance at all (aromanticism).
Key concepts of the ‘asexual spectrum’
There are many nuances within the community. Here are the main ones:
- Demisexuality: attraction only arises after a deep emotional connection has been formed.
- Grey-asexuality (Grey-Ace): attraction occurs very rarely or only in specific circumstances.
- Aro-ace: people who experience neither sexual nor romantic attraction.
Why is this important for the support sector?
Asexual people face the same challenges as the wider LGBTQ+ community: the need to come out, the risk of encountering coercive conversion therapy, or the invalidation of their personal experiences (‘it’s just a phase’). Prejudice against the asexual community is known as asexophobia.
Statistics show that asexual people are more likely to experience anxiety and depression. This is often the result of isolation and a lack of adequate support. In our region, these risks are exacerbated by the pressure of traditional expectations regarding family and marriage.
Specifics of experience and intersectionality
Discrimination often operates at the intersection of different identities:
- Gender: People with masculine socialisation or a masculine identity may find it harder to speak openly about their asexuality due to stereotypes about ‘constant sexual readiness’ as a marker of masculinity. Transgender people often face pathologisation in medical settings: professionals sometimes mistakenly link asexuality to the transition process.
- Age: Young people are often told they are ‘immature’, whilst older people are told that a lack of attraction is merely a consequence of ageing, disregarding their self-identification.
- Neurodiversity and disability: Neurodivergent people and people with disabilities often face the myth that they are ‘asexual’, which leads to their actual orientation not being taken seriously.
Practical steps towards inclusivity
To ensure an organisation is a safe space for the asexual community, consider the following:
- Validate experiences. If those seeking support mention asexuality or aromanticism, accept this as fact. Do not look for ‘underlying causes’ or attempt to ‘fix’ the person.
- Avoid unnecessary questions. Only ask about a person’s sex life when it is genuinely necessary for providing a service (for example, in a highly specialised medical context). In all other cases, this is private information.|
- Adapting documentation. It is worth adding the option ‘asexuality’ to the ‘sexual orientation’ section of questionnaires. Use neutral wording: ‘having a partner’ or ‘close relationships’ instead of binary categories (e.g. ‘husband/wife’).
- Reducing sexualisation. In event announcements or venue design, it is best to avoid emphasising that the search for a sexual partner is the main goal of any interaction.
- Visibility. Mentioning asexuality in your materials marks your space as safe
Inclusivity is not a destination, but an ongoing journey. A sincere desire to learn and listen to the community is what makes support truly effective.
